Thursday, 13 October 2011

And the turd was THIS long!

Thought that title would get you!

This little gem of information popped out in my English class today! From an old guy who I am guessing is sinking over-so-quickly into another stage of Alzheimer's.

I simply couldn't believe it. Totally inappropriate. Totally awful. But very funny.

This gentleman has declined over the past year. He used to be the bright, chatty, physically active senior - a bit of a rascal, but polite and kind to other members.
Then I started to notice that he couldn't remember details of stories he was trying to tell - in a mixture of English and Japanese - couldn't remember the words or places.
Then earlier this year he was diagnosed with throat? cancer and spent time in hospital, but came back to classes afterwards - quite a bit changed - fading in and out of focus on the class, losing more and more words, behaving a bit strangely.
His pronunciation is pretty bad and he mixes in a lot of Japanese and English, so most of the other students - four women - don't understand what he says.

Thangoodness after today's performance!

"How are you today Mr. X?" I brightly asked, after we'd already heard other students' reports about walks in the autumn colors, shopping trips and other innocuous topics.

"Hah! This morning I went for a long walk, it was good for me, I've been constipated for a week, and when I came back I went to the toilet and it was good, my turd was 20 cm long, like this. really big.....}_`~="!#$&%&".

I was laughing and trying to stay polite, and trying to SHUT HIM DOWN quickly before the ladies realized what he was talking about. Luckily it was such a mix of Japanese and bad English I don't think they realized...but I did...oh my...oh my.

We are so lucky that, at the moment, Okaasan doesn't do anything like this - well she hardly HAS any social life anyway, but she doesn't talk about wildly inappropriate topics....lots of giggling like a child, which is strange for an old lady...but giggling is sweet and funny. 
Turd boasting isn't.

I guess I have some kind of spotter sense for dementia now - I notice that our old neighbor - the wonderful 90 year old who cares for her big garden almost single-handedly, is showing a few signs this past summer.
She often doesn't know what day or time it is, and she's mentioned twice now that the bank are giving her problems with the money and she has to go and talk to them. Maybe she DOES have money problems, but my sense tells me the "problems" are in her own confusion.

But that's minor compared to turd talk in an English class.
I hope he doesn't repeat this kind of behaviour, it would be hard to ask the class managers to talk to his family and get him pulled out of the class...


  1. I've never had that problem least not with a possible Alzheimer-suffering student.

    I did have a Jr High School boy mime what he did in the toilet after I sent him out of the class...for smelling up my classroom! (Luckily a private class, so not quite as terrible as it sounds.)

    I did work in a bank before Japan and there was a senior residence in our neighbourhood. There were quite a few times when we'd have customers come in and we'd have to help them, or in some cases, call relatives. It was so sad how quickly it progressed in some cases.

    Sorry, I wrote a novel...

  2. No Problem to write a novel!
    I feel so sorry for this guy, because I have seen him deteriorate over the past year - and I know him being in the class is starting to make the other students impatient, but as a community center class it is impossible to stop him coming....but thinking about it since yesterday I feel I maybe HAVE to at least tell the manager, so if they get complaints they are a little forewarned about the situation....