Friday, 9 May 2025

Slight changes

 Good and bad.

A week after the nurse pointed out that Okaasan was no longer on the blood pressure meds...she had a fever and low blood pressure. So back on the meds.

We've visited twice since then. Yesterday Okaasan appeared to open her eyes slightly. Her pupils didn't focus on anything, and it may well have been an involuntary movement. But we took it as a positive, as we sat there with the Bossa Nova music playing softly on the mobile phone.

I cleaned out her mouth drool with tissue paper. We patted her shoulders. 

We came home.

Sunday, 27 April 2025

Hello spring 2025

 

Hello spring 2025

The pink flowers are popping out all over and warm weather is coming (in fits and starts).

And Okaasan is lying in a bed with tubes into and out of her body, deeply sleeping. Day after day.

I just checked back on this blog and found that she went into this home/hospital in December 2021, so that's over 3 years ago. It's hard to remember, because of all the COVID restrictions, when we couldn't even go and visit her. But over 3 years now.

This week we had a good chat with one of the nurses about Okaasan. We could do anytime - the staff are friendly et. But there isn't a lot to be said about a sleeping human in bed with tubes. The doctor phones if there is anything major to be reported.

Anyway, this nurse was very approachable and responded to our questions well:  she said that Okaasan is "sleeping" pretty much 24/7, but reacts a little if the staff are moving her body/the tubes - react as in face grimaces or eye lid flickering. She showed us how talking very loudly right in Okaasan's ear, or cleaning around her eyes with a cotton pad gets a slight facial change.  And that it's been like that for almost a year now.

The "improvement" is that Okaasan isn't on the blood pressure-control drip now. Just the sugar-drip feed. Just one bag of something attached to the stand by her bed.

And so.

Dear Son was feeling it all a bit this week. As we sat there he talked about how there is no change, how he made the choices for his mother to be like this at the end of her life, and how it will be if and when WE get to be like this.

Oh god! I HOPE neither of us is like this. I hope I wake up one morning and he is just dead in bed next to me. Or the other way around. Of course, a shock for the living person. But WAY better than this looooonnnggg process. I don't think Japan will ever move to a more liberal way of death - allowing any element of personal choice. It just isn't part of this culture.

So, if I am going to die in Japan. If I am going to be here when Dear Son dies - then this "where do you want the tubes" process is very likely. A student's father died last year - 3 days after being admitted to hospital for blood problems. She visited him and sat chatting in the day room. He died in the hospital bed the next morning. So quick. So easy.

Sorry! So easy on this blog to go down these thought roads. It's a spring day and life is good. Okaasan is ok. We are ok. The cat is ok. 2025 is rolling on...

Wednesday, 15 January 2025

Starting 2025...with a wheeze...

 NOT a happy and healthy New Year for us.

And many other people, it seems.


The actual winter holiday was good - eating and drinking, some skiing and a lot of TV.

Did a bit of housework, made a small start on sorting out old papers and photos.

Back to work January 6. All ready to go! Dear Son had spent 2 days fighting off a head cold the weekend before. I did my Jan. 6 online class and felt a little "something" in my throat.

Next day: out of it all.

Head Cold....tired, blocked nose....tired again...bed, sleep, water, more sleep.

Cancelled two days of classes. 

Third day energy levels back up, I got out of my pajamas. And then...no voice!

That went on for the next 4 days. MORE cancelled work. A whole week lost. That's the very big downside of self employed, you lose financially a lot when you are sick.

And in the middle of this Okaasan's hospital call to say SHE has influenza. That it's all over the wards. We were more worried about her than us...

But, amazingly two days later her fever had gone and she is ok again. So strong! We still can't visit, of course. But she has pulled thru that.

So. I am back to work since yesterday. The voice isn't strong, but serviceable. I did a TV documentary dubbing job (had to postpone it twice last week), so if you ever see a program about a Japanese man trying new technology to combat loss of voice after throat cancer...and you think "Hmm, his wife's voice doesn't sound so healthy..." you are right. His "wife's voice" had just crept into the studio after 4 days of frantically mime-life and eating a lot of ginger!


Onwards into a healthier year :-)


Tuesday, 31 December 2024

Another year...

 Well - HELLO there!


I do occasionally pass the computer and remember I have a blog.



Greetings from the bedside.
Okaasan asleep. As usual.
Dear Son and That British Woman sitting bedside, chatting about the shopping they are going to do soon, the plot of last night's Netflix movie, what to eat for New Year...
The hospital reopened last month after COVID had made its rounds, and we are back to weekly visits. Masks and playing music-she-might-like on the smartphone.

No changes with Okaasan's condition. She sleeps. Shakes her head. Moves her eyelids. Clutches the pillow/towel.
Years past there are so many Okaasan memories: as she tried to have a semblance of O-Shogatsu with the foreign daughter in law. The time when we tried to cook together, the (several) times when I bought stuff and then she bought the same stuff...the time when I served her and son rice cake soup BEFORE the traditional eating day of January 1.

This year it's a quiet hospital room. The TV is playing inane chat shows from another bedside, the staff drift in and out with charts and trays.

2025 is heading over the snowy hills.

Happy New Year to you and your loved ones.


He and I are home for the holidays. Maybe skiing. Eating. TV and computer. I should actually tidy the house, prepare my accounts for February.
He'll be making himself some instant soba noodles, I'll be eating some guacamole and crackers. 

Onwards!!!