Friday, 12 November 2010

Day 4


A bit of One of Those Days.

The beer I am drinking now has never tasted so good.

Weather looked ok, so I left the "We are Out, so you should go and have lunch out" laminated sign on the kitchen table with Y1,000. Briefly chatted to Okaasan in the kitchen as she was heading to the loo while I was heading to the shower.

A busy day at work, with new students and a returning student.
I got back early afternoon - mainly to keep the cats company because I knew I'd be a bit late.
Recently a large, menacing local stray has been hanging around - and even daring to peer round the open window/door - scaring Popo and Chichi badly. So we can't leave windows open so much. It's interesting that even though there are two of them and one of him - he knows they are youngsters and no match at all.

Anyway. Came home about 1.30 pm.
Okaasan was here. Watching Tv. She'd eaten pickled bits of fish and a yogurt.
I offered to make her lunch (not too enthusiastically I must admit) , but she stirred herself to going out and about 2 pm she finally got out.

I kept the cats company. Put on the rice for dinner. Grabbed a pile of dirty underwear out of Okaasan's smelly room...a few plastic bags etc. Waited till the washing machine finished and then put the clean, damp pants in a bowl on the carpet just inside her room: with any luck she'll think she washed them herself and will take them to the next stage of hanging them up.
I think that recently she hasn't been doing the hand-washing for the endless pants so much.
She always used to be doing it constantly - and leaving bowls of damp pants here and there in the bathroom, kitchen and her room.
Recently - really nothing.
I know she bought yet more pants yesterday because I found the bag and receipt.

So the PILE of pants in her room.....I don't think she notices it, or has the get-up-and-go to start washing by hand such a mountain of underwear.
So - maybe we need to do more of her washing - either secretly as up till now, taking them quietly while she is out and returning them to her room likewise...or more openly by going and asking her to put things in a laundry bag for the machine.

At 3 pm. Back to work.
New students stayed late.
I finally got home at 7.15 pm, with supermarket sashimi and salad. And cake from students.
Okaasan not bothered, no problem.

At dinner I turned on the full charm and chatted her up about all sorts of topics: cake and Christmas, and wartime and food, and wartime work and heating and children, and wartime food etc etc.

Then I mentioned the hula dance event next week.
"There's an event? Nobody told me! Really? What are we dancing? I don't know about this!"
Two days ago she knew about this.
Monday and Tuesday she went off to the rehearsals. Talked about it later etc.
Today - a complete blank on the subject.
Just nothing.
She was surprised to hear. Wondered what they would be dancing. Wondered when the practice would be. etc etc etc.

It's going to be a bit hard on Monday because I'll be at work and Yujiro isn't back from Tokyo till evening. I'll be booking a taxi to come and take Okaasan to the hotel in the afternoon with a bag of stuff I have to prepare for her.
But I'd like to her to at least REALIZE there is an event!!!
I can see the taxi driver coming at 1.30 pm and Okaasan still being in her pyjamas in front of the TV. i'd better get Yujiro to call her from Tokyo several times that morning to make sure she is getting ready.

THIS is the mad life we are leading!!!!

This beer is so good.


  1. I am beginning to wonder if it is easier when they have full blown dementia or when they don't. My MIL didn't tell us about the "hoji" that she was going to in her hometown till a few days BEFORE....I had to change the schedule at work so my kid wouldn't be alone on that day. (Hubs had work too)... Is that dementia caused or on purpose???? *aargh!!!*

  2. Could be...or not.
    Dementia is a strange beast - and takes everyone differently with a few shared characteristics. I'm guessing that as she KNEW there was an event, and when it was and made plans in her mind for it - just telling you so late is more old person self-centeredness, not thinking about what she is going to do and how the effects the rest of the family.
    Okaasan kind of knew about this hula event - went to two days of practice for it on Monday and Tuesday with everyone talking about it - and then....3 days later has ABSOLUTELY no memory of that...and thinks nobody told her etc etc