Time.
Funny thing with dementia.
Okaasan often not sure if it is morning or afternoon....spring or winter.
If we set a time for going somewhere she will usually be ready WAY before necessary, sitting ready with her coat on and all ready to go.
How long has something been happening? That too...a bit of a fog.
"How long have you lived in Sapporo?" asked the city office staff recently.
"Sapporo? Oh, 10 years...."
This week I took the nice winter coat to the dry cleaners and returned it to Okaasan. Hoping she will wear it again, instead of summer coat or cardigan.
"That's an old coat, I bought it years ago, it's all old and dirty...I should buy a new coat..." Okaasan kept telling us.
"No, no - you only bought it 4 years ago, with Dear Son, in a department store in Tokyo...it was dirty, now it is clean again..."
The coat IS a little damaged on the arm, where Okaasan fell on the road last year. Will she notice the damage? Will she refuse to wear it? If she doesn't, can I wear it instead....such a waste...it was an expensive coat only 4 years ago.
Ho hum....maybe have to buy a new coat.
Once upon a time...a time...a time...
4 years ago today I started this blog. I'd just accpeted my boyfriend's plan to bring his confused old mother to live with us....and I had no idea how life was about to change.
I've grown up a whole lot. So has he. We became adults...in our 40s...
I never thought I'd continue writing this blog. It was suggested by one of my students, and she translated many of the early entries - but got overwhelmed by my endless postings and stopped....
Friends have suggested turning it all into a book - which I might after Okaasan has popped off to the big kotatsu.
But for now, it is what it started out as - a place for me to vent and moan, as well as a place where friends and friends-I've-never-met catch up on what's happening.
Once upon a time...Okaasan and Me started.
Wow, four years have passed already! Reading your first entry and your description of your MIL now, there doesn't seem to be so much decline, considering all the problems in the beginning. I guess it shows the importance of living with people who can give a sense of community, so all of the things that you are doing for her to support her. I think also that she will really enjoy the day care and being able to talk with other people, care givers and the clients. I think you are doing a great job, and it's great that you can celebrate your journey and document it. It will be interesting to see the next phase. I know she is not one for going to the doctor, but has she had her vaccines? Nancy
ReplyDeleteIt's interesting to try and think how her abilities have changed in 4 years - not dramatic - but certainly a decline. We provide the daily life support so I think that cushions her, without us she would be in a complete mess - and she doesn't cope well with any stressful situation, so it would all be a downward spiral. Vaccines? No, I doubt she's ever had them and certainly won't start now!
ReplyDeleteHappy Blogiversary (Blogaversary?) I've been reading since almost the beginning and am constantly amazed at how much you do for Okaasan. I doubt that I would be willing to do as much for mine. I'm in awe of you and how you have improved the life of your MIL.
ReplyDeleteI'd read the book! Honestly I would :-)