Goodbye Okaasan.
Kazuko died earlier this week and we have just returned from her funeral.
I will write more another day.
But, today is just to let you know that her 95 years of eventful life have closed and she (thankfully) passed quickly and peacefully into her next adventure.
The end came fairly suddenly, a week ago she had a slight fever and slightly ragged breathing. It's the long spring holiday called Golden Week in Japan, so the hospital is actually closed to family visits. But we suddenly got a call on Sunday morning, and by late Sunday evening she had passed.
Today is a beautiful sunny day. The sky is blue, the cherry blossom and other flowers are everywhere. It's a good day to remember Okaasan, who loved flowers and color and laughter.
More later.
I am so sorry for your loss. I'm glad her passing was peaceful. She was fortunate
ReplyDeleteto have had a lovey son and daughter inlaw.
Warmest regards,
Laura
Thankyou! we tried...not always successfully...but we did try.
DeleteWow I was not expecting this news; I read your 2 May post and now this! My condolences to Yujiro and yourself, Amanda. I'm genuinely glad Okaasan is now free of that hospital bed she had been in for so long. Much love.
ReplyDeleteYes, it's strange how I wrote the May 2 Post, and 24 hours later she had passed. He and I have been talking to eachother and close friends about our future plans - for months...years now. This was the first time i'd actually written it in a public forum (my students read this blog and didn't know I was retiring...). It WAS a relief. She would have hated the last few years of medical kept-alive...
DeleteI've been reading your blog for many years, and I knew I would read a post like this someday -- but somehow it still feels like a surprise. I'm glad she slipped away quickly without any suffering, and I wish you and your husband peace as you begin to write your next chapter.
ReplyDeleteI'm so conflicted here....I'm sorry for your partner losing his mother, but I'm also glad that Okaasan had a gentle, quiet release from her hospital bed.
ReplyDeleteI've been reading your blog for years and it has helped me both in dealing with the death of my husband's grandmother (103 when she died) and dealing with my husband's mother. Sadly, I don't have the friendly relationship that you had with your Okaasan, but that's partially on me!
I wish you both calm and peace as you deal with family matters. May it go smoothly.
Like others, I have read your blog for many years and enjoyed the little snapshots into your life as a DIL in Hokkaido. While I don't read blogs much these days, I always check in here every few months because I suspected that this post would eventually come. I am glad that you all are able to have a kind of relief and release now from this and I know that Okaasan had a full life and is at peace now. Your writings have encouraged me to think about how I want my own end-of-life to unfold if I were in a similar situation. I hope you two are able to enjoy your upcoming van life and I'll still keep checking in every few months to see how it's going.
ReplyDeleteThankyou Jason. I hope Okaasan is in a place of flowers, Hawaiian dance music and nice magazines to look at. and oh YES...all of this has made me think very much about end of life. I still haven't taken practical steps about that, beyond telling DS what I want and don't want. However, if I am seriously sick and in a carehome/hospital in Japan it's sobering to know he wouldn't be able to do much more than what he had to do for his mother. You/the family can choose what kind of tube feeding you will accept - which would make a difference of how long you would survive, but doctors would also use medication to maintain blood pressure. I really MUST get serious about writing an End of Life document stating exactly what I want. There is an NPO for this in Japan, it's all in Japanese - I think I will probably pay for a translation of the whole thing - maybe make that translation available (on the internet?) to other English speakers? It's a thought...
DeleteSending good thoughts from a very long time reader. Your kindness always cane through in your writing. I hope you will continue. Thank you for sharing the journey.
ReplyDeleteAhh...thankyou. Long time....that is still surprising to me - that people continued with all of this a long time. Probably only a few more posts to go, I think I will finish this blog soon...
DeleteSorry to hear this news. I’m a longtime reader of your blog and enjoyed it as a former longterm resident of Japan and also found it comforting when looking after my mother who had similar issues. I really hope you continue the blog as you embark on your next chapter!
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear of your loss. My deepest condolences
ReplyDelete