Family time.

We played Happy Family at the weekend.
Took Okaasan downtown in the car, delivered her to the hair salon and then 2 hours later picked up an amazingly transformed, classy-cut lady and took her to dinner in a department store.
;-)

Haircut SO improves Okaasan. Probably inside the head, as well as out.

When we go out with her the little Okaasan-isms are there all the time : the constant checking questions, the ready-way-ahead-of-time, the clothing oddities ("I need to take my toweling dress to the hair salon to wear OVER my blouse and pants, in case it is cold") and the ramdom comments about things glimpsed from the car.
But she was happy. It all wasn't too stressful for us. Mission Accomplished.

Random bits here too:

# Day car manager came for a regular meeting last week, and Okaasan appeared to agree that she would like to go to the center TWICE a week. We doubt that was a real, understood decision. Probably just being polite and agreeing with a visitor.
I find it interesting that she actually qualifies for two days a week - I thought it was only once a week. Maybe they start everyone at one and try to increase it? Would be wonderful if she'd go.....we'll see if she continues at once a week in April and whether twice in May is doable.

#WE just bought a DVD player for Okaasan's TV. We've just recorded and watched a great program about amateur videos shot in Japan between 1946-1960 - ordinary life and big events - and we think Okaasan would LOVE to see this program (and others like it). Japanese TV is recently waking up to the fact that increasing numbers of viewers are oldies and want nostalgia programs...so now there are more and more about old singers, reruns of old dramas and the like.
Okaasan stares at the TV all day - often TV shopping and the weather channel (when she presses the wrong button on the remote), the DVD player would mean we could show her programs we think she'd enjoy.

And, in another family...

:-)  I had lunch with an old colleague last week - who has been caring for her dementia-suffering mother alone for years. Now mum is finally in care.
I asked what had finally forced her to use full-time care. Did something happen? Mum had a meltdown? Violence?
"Yes, my blood pressure went way up!".......

:-( But less smiley face. The same friend said that recently her mother's face looks unhappy when one care center staff enters the room, and finally the other day mum managed to get out the word "bullying"...now she is worried what is happening to her mum and the other old residents when family members are not around. She is going to leave a secret recording device next to mum's bed.

Okaasan is SO lucky to be with Dear Son and his amazing girlfriend.

Wasn't this just winter?

She remembers :-(
As we chivvied Okaasan along to get ready for hula dance yesterday...there was an initial "didn't I quit Hula?" - which we easily overrode with reassurances...and then a few minutes later:
"I thought I was only doing this in winter, is it still continuing?".
We overrode THAT too, with "oh, but it's fun, you enjoy dance don't you?"....and she got ready to go. With help. Stuffing countless pairs of pants in the bag and trying to select a T-shirt with the coat in the other hand.

BUGGER.

We overrode her thoughts pretty easily this time, but I'm disappointed that the thought was there.
Of course, it doesn't matter really if she wants to stop going - but it would be SO much better if she continued dance and day care, and going somewhere and talking to people once a week.
In spring to autumn Okaasan goes out walking every day, so we aren't worried about the physical exercise, but of course the day care is the mental/social exercise too.
And if she quit now, it might be a struggle to get her going again next winter.

:-(

Hmm.. Hoping.
We got her ready and off she went for hula. Came home tired, but happy. Apparently.
Maybe it was just a knee-jerk negative response to being dug up out of early-morning snoozing. Maybe not a considered opinion.
Hope not.

Spling has splung.

"Spling" as a hair salon near me has announced - is here finally in Sapporo.
Dirty piles of snow are melting, the streets are almost walkable in normal shoes and even the garden is beginning to appear.
Time for one more ski this weekend?

He is home and our life is quietly normal. I'm having a quiet week at work too, so I go to the gym, go home, catch up on e mails to friends, actually read the newspaper....

Okaasan went off to day care and ballroom dancing, without a peep of protest.
Said "It was fun", when she came home.

I wonder; how much longer will she agree to go?
When we were all trying to push her into the terrible idea we argued: "the roads are bad in winter, you can't walk, so this is good winter exercise....".
Now the roads are better and better. Will she announce that she doesn't want to go? Will the enjoyment of the dance and (maybe) the other people be strong enough to keep her positive about the experience?
Soooooo hope so.

At dinner after day care Dear Son asked her if she had enjoyed it. She said she had.
And that was it. Usually you would offer some piece of information about that experience - but Okaasan offers nothing. No comments about the lunch at the center, the flowers, the other people, the dance class.
I think she knows she went there - probably the actual details of the day are a fog.

So. Fingers crossed that she will continue going.

End in sight

Tonight - another 12 days of solo Oyomesanning will be finished. I hope.
The last big ski instructing job of the season ends and he'll be home.
Okaasan is drifting along in her days. Chatting to me at dinner times. Going for walks when I tell her it is ok. Eating her delivered lunchboxes. Washing plates...sometimes.
Snug under the new heated table.

I spent a relaxed weekend. Lots of pleasure, food and sleep.
Ready for a new week.

But ready for him to come home and share this job.