I write a lot of negative stuff here about Okaasan - stuff she can't do, times when she gives me frustration.
Here is a positive posting. :-)
Yesterday after bath and lunch I offered to drive her to the subway station for a trip downtown and she jumped at the chance.
Got ready in 20 minutes. CAN do it if the motivation is strong enough.
At the station I made sure she had an up to date subway card and tried to remind her how to phone ME when she came back later.
"No, don't press number 1 on the cell phone - that's DS, and he isn't here....press number 2 - like this - and it will be me! I will come and get you".
Repeated a few times as we stood outside the station entrance.
Not hopeful. In the past she has called Dear Son, and he calls me. Or she waits and waits in a convenience store until I find her by chance. Last week she actually called the house telephone - using the emergency contact card we put in her handbag.
Yesterday?
At 4.15 pm came a call on my cell phone while I was doing housework and studying kanji.
A call from Okaasan. :-)
"I'm at the station! Can you pick me up?"
I was SO happy and pleased with her. She got it!
Whether she'll keep it for next time is another matter. But yesterday she had it.
Even more rays of sunshine: we had a fish and veggie nabe for dinner, lots of chat about wartime food and how Japanese should eat fish because the country is an island...
and then - she washed up all the plates after the meal.
A good day.
You should celebrate with a glass of wine.!!
ReplyDeleteOK...all caught up now. Still can only post as Anon though ?? Why??
ReplyDeleteAnyway, so glad to hear of times of smooth sailing with Okaasan. So much you say is identical to the situation with my Nanny ("other Mother" childhood BFF mother.) She has since passed, but the last ten years were oh so similar. She would talk for hours about the past, incredible recall of times, people and details. But 10 min ago, .....nada.
WE heard the stories so many times, we had them memorized, and could work them into a full on reminiscing 2 way convo. It really tickled her, she thought we were all there at the same time :)
She especially enjoyed going back to the places of her youth (easy, having always lived here) but we would also take her back to the mountains of NC state (her birth and early years place) , and she could navigate easily around the small towns and point out places that she remembered and what she did there. I think the trip to Kawagoe (maybe in the Springtime for the Cherry Blossoms) is a SUPER idea. Esp since they have tried to preserve the Old Town aspect.
Oh well, a lot just to say that however hard it is (and I know) I look back at those last years with Nanny, and they were some of the best EVER. out of the 45 years I had known her. Many memories made for us, even though she probably remembered nothing of it. But she was happy as a lark, and totally enjoyed (but soon forgot) whatever we were doing
.
This time is so precious (and annoying) and you are doing a marvelous job. Keep it up, it wont be forever. :)
Liz in Ga. USA