Kotatsu specialist

Went and bought one.
Couldn't be bothered with all the repair it? wait? try it again? stuff.
Particularly since the repair shop said 2-3 weeks to send the heater unit back to the makers. I'd already carted the bugger around all day on my working course round the subways (between classes, I don't WORK in the subways) - and what with too many goodbye-I'm-quitting-your-class presents f rom students really loading me down I was bag lady today.
Left knee - feeeeling the stress.

So I ferreted out a shop display table and heater in Bic Camera, waited 45 minutes while they checked it and packed it, loaded it into a taxi and went home.
(taxi driver has actually nodded off on the taxi rank, I had to tap on the window...didn't inspire great confidence...but he got me home at top speed.)
The taxi fare cost more than the kotatsu.

Then back to my classroom for one evening lesson.
Then back home to dish up curry and broccolli to Okaasan and while she finished off her dinner - including a second portion of rice - I grovelled around on the kitchen floor and unpacked the kotatsu, and put it together for her.
The old one is in bits around the house. Maybe the cats would like it?

Hopefully end of story.
My overriding concern - the more I thought about it - was the worry that the old kotatsu sometimes working/sometimes not feature was an early sign of faulty wiring and that the kotatsu might burst into flames while Okaasan slept. And then I would feel guilty as hell.
So. She is downstairs now. Tucked for the night. Thanks to her Oyomesan. It was yet another loooong day.

And. One more thing.
Today was hula dance at day care.
She didn't put up a fight about going. Off she went and came home happy and tired.

But.

This morning I had to help her get dressed.
Actually had to choose the clothes and hold them out to put her arms into them.
That's a first.

She didn't seem to know HOW to choose a camisole. She stood there picking them up and putting them down again. Or stuffing them in her day care bag (which already contained 4 camisoles and 6 pairs of pants..).
She held the camisoles in her hands and looked at them, as if not sure if this was the right piece of clothing or how to put it on?

Finally I picked one up and held it open for her, told her to take off her pajamas and slip it over her head. Then did the same with a blouse.

It's the first time I've actually dressed her. Usually my involvement is as advisor...but the actual physical act of putting the clothes on she could do.

Not this morning.

;-(

Two's company...

"Love me tender!
"Love me true!"

As channelled my inner Elvis at the dinner table last night by serenading Okaasan across the dinner table last night, I thought: "God, I'm good at this!"

Another dinner, another day, another week with Okaasan.

Came home between classes to prep dinner and feed cats. Okaasan was heading out for a walk wearing a lively combination of house coat, 3 T-shirts, a scarf, a hat and a coat.
"Is this ok? Maybe in Tokyo no, but Sapporo isn't so formal, is it?".
Always, the asking for advice about clothing. I think Tokyo and Sapporo has the same standards of crazy-old-lady-combinations - but I just smiled and let her go. As long as she is warm it doesn't matter what she wears.
After she left I went into her room to tidy up a little and take out trash. Process more laundry.
Out to an evening class.
Home in a snow storm to get fish, rice, vegetables, soup on the table.

Cast around for a topic to chat about: did the Japanese Prime Minister speak English with President Obama? Few years ago Prime Minister Koizumi performed Elvis for Bush....Elvis....like Japan's old star Ishihara Yujiro...Ahh HA!
Ishihara Yujiro! BINGO!
I used to go to a healthy food cooking school in Tokyo and someone told me that Ishihara Yujiro's home was nearby, and I told my husband, and he wasn't interested in famous people, but even HE came to look at the house - because Ishihara was so famous!

Repeat for - oh...about 10 times.....and no, that isn't an exageration - she really  did repeat that story 10 times. Until I started clearing plates and muttering about "cats outside still" and "must prep tomorrow's classes".

Like the game 7 Degrees of Kevin Bacon, talking to Okaasan is much easier if you can find a way onto one of her fave topics. The cooking school and Ishihara's house, and the husband coming to look at it is a fave topic.
I am getting so good at getting her onto these hamster wheels.

Onwards.
These times alone with all the responsibility are a bit tough. I have to plan it all carefully and make sure there is time for all the must do stuff and the want to do stuff.
And then there is snow. Had 23 cm of it again yesterday. Endless snow clearing...endless.

Onwards. Endless.
Ishihara Yujiro had a home near my cooking school, and my husband came to look at it....

Repeat after me.

aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oyomesan's New Year Survival Guide

So, you are home a deux for New Year with your demented mother-in-law.

What's a woman to do?

First you need:

 

A whole LOT of New Year food ingredients from the supermarket.

Plus: recent cooking lessons in the art of creating traditional Japanese dishes.

Note - you should also buy some New Year flowers for the mother-in-law to show off her once-upon-a-time high level ikebana skills.

But for now she's lost her special flower scissors...and err...now she's forgotten about it.

 

And then. You will need:

 

A very cute blue rented car - to get you to the above supermarket, to various ski resorts, out with Friend and Baby, and to ferry Okaasan around and for you to basically escape.

And then, you will need:

Lots of Christmas delicious stuff under the rubber plant...chocolates, cakes, a mini-Christmas Pud, a bottle of sparkling wine, marshmallows in the shape of snowmen....

And then you are set.

Cute Cats - check.
Word games on the computer - check.
Tv - check.
Skis at the ready in the hall - check.
Business accounts since November to input to the computer. Bugger.
Two narration jobs the first working week back in January. Bugger.
New classes to prep. Bugger.

And you are ready.....for a New Year holiday without the other half and left alone with his mother.

Can't believe it really! He's always been around - late - but around, to advice on what food goes with what food and when it is served. New Year is a big deal in Japan. I've had enough years to practice, Now I have to give Okaasan a Happy New Year......

Today I stayed home and was a perfect Oyomesan. I hardly spend whole days at home. So...

I got her prepped up for a bath in the morning, went shopping for all the food haul, gave her lunch and chat about flower arranging, washed up the lunch things; got Okaasan ready to go out (it's getting harder and harder for her to do this); took her to the station, waved her off, cleaned her room, washed her underwear, threw out papers and a rotting pear and old sushi box; made the chicken and veggies stewed thing I learned from the cooking teacher, tracked Okaasan on the GPS and picked her up at 5.30 pm by car from the station, cooked dinner, gave it to her.....and broke open some chocolate coins with a beer and the rerun of the London Olympics on Tv....

All in a day's Oyomesan work.

Umani - chicken and veggies all stewed with soy sauce and sugar...


* Okaasan is definately getting worse at prepping to go out. The endless checking and rechecking for keys/phone/subway card/umbrella/bag/shopping bag/scarf.
She was setting out in a T-shirt and a cardigan, until I got her into a long sleeved heat-tech shirt and a coat...and then she later came home...without the shopping bag. So another umbrella and a pair of gloves has been lost... She never used to be so bad at getting dressed and getting her stuff together. Now, it's a really hard task for her.

Haahhhh..... and so tomorrow is the end of 2012......another year of Oyomesanning.

Friend with Baby said the other day that she has an awful vision of the future: that Dear Son will be paralysed or dead in a ski accident and I will be left looking after Okaasan alone.
No way. It isn't going to happen.
I think - hope - I am getting better at caring for this old lady, making sure her days are familiar and safe.
But no - if he isn't around, I'll be phoning the Useless Older Brother in Saitama and the Uncle to say: "She's on an airplane to you soon, you should prepare a living situation for her."

Aghhhh.....winter holidays 2012-13.....Okaasan and Me.
 

 

Throwing beans at scary men.

Bloody foot prints across the hall.
The victim stretched out sorrowfully by the heater.
OMG! OMG! OMG!


Detective Oyomesan was on the case.
But the fat cat victim couldn't talk, and his fur is so thick I couldn't find the wound.


And I had to go to work.


Came home early to take Popo to the vets...by taxi....
The vet too had a hard time hunting around the fat, plush pussy for a wound...but finally found a torn paw nail and a little bit of blood.
Phew!
Two years ago these two kitties came into our lives and I wanted to celebrate that happily, not with some rush-to-the-vet-with-credit-card-drama.


Two years ago they were like this: skinny and scared.

Chichi (left) and Popo (right).

And now they are fat, muscular and far too confident....

Popo (left) and Chichi (right).

ANYWAY. Back to the old lady. Cos this blog is supposedly about life with HER...not me rambling on about my cats....

During the day, thinking about how the cats came to us 2 years ago, I realized it was  Feb. 3 Setsubun, the Bean Throwing Festival in Japan. 

Originally I'd wanted to call the cats "Mame" and "Maki", meaning "Bean" and "Scatter/Scatter", but agreed to Yujiro's wish to delve into his childhood for manga character names instead - he chose the names of two wolf brothers, thus ensuring I will stand in the garden for years calling names which sound in English like Moulin Rouge showgirls.

Bean Throwing Festival is a driving out the bad luck, welcoming in good luck event. Families get dried soy beans and in the evening throw them around the house saying "Demons go away! Good luck come in!", then you eat the same number of beans as your age and eat a roll of seaweed stuffed with vegetables and fish facing in a different lucky direction every year.

Drive away demons! Great! Excellent chance to bond with Okaasan over a traditional event and drive away scary men ringing door bells. Yes! Bingo!

I bought the most traditional-looking box of beans in a supermarket full of peanuts, chocolates and even chocolate-covered soybeans (Hokkaido isn't so traditional) and bought two big sushi rolls.

Got home to whisk the cat away to the vets in a waiting taxi, found Okaasan washing underpants by hand in the bathroom....and wearing NO underpants....just a pajama top. 

Just as well I hadn't brought my friend and her baby home as planned before injured cat saga. Okaasan is increasingly get strange about her clothing choice....this is the third ? time recently I've found her at home without underpants on...

An hour later Okaasan, finally wearing suitable clothes, decided to go out. I gave her money and off she went. I prepped the dinner: HER favorite fish salmon, potatoes, veggies, soup, sushi roll etc etc and a box of soy beans for banishing demons.

Dinner time. Okaasan didn't come back.

Happens all the time.....grrrr...I plan something....and she doesn't show in time, or doesn't feel like eating it.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

At 7.30 pm I ate dinner alone. Read the newspaper. Washed my plates. Went back upstairs. Poured a glass of plum wine. Found a movie on the TV. Sat down.

The front door opened downstairs.

Grrrr.....back downstairs. Heat up the food again, chat, chat, chat.

Okaasan was VERY happy about the soy beans. All giggly. We went into her room, opened the window and she took a handful of beans and tossed them out into the snow. Then she gave me beans to toss too. 

Hope THAT drives away the scary door bell ringers from her mind.

Maybe it'll just attract crows near the windows to eat the beans and the sound of their wings near the windows will give Okaasan all kinds of other scary imaginings.

Back to the kitchen where I served up her dinner and sat awhile talking about the lucky sushi roll and things. Then finally, about 8.30 I made the friend-telephoning-soon excuse and left her eating alone.

One more day to go! One more day to go! He just mailed me that he hopes to be back tomorrow afternoon. And then my Full-time Oyomesan Duties will be over, for now.

And will the doorbell ringer stop? I guess so.

Whether scared away by the sight of the car in the parking area, or the reassuring presence of Dear Son in the home....or by the magic of dried soy beans, we will never know.

Summer blues again?

No-show at Hula dance yesterday.
Don't know why.
And Okaasan looked kind of down and stressed when she came back from a late afternoon walk to the shops.
SO down and tired that I even made her a cup of instant coffee and sat there in the kitchen chatting about weather and cats and garden.....at dinner she was withdrawn and didn't talk much, we worked hard to brighten her up and get a few smiles and laughs.


But I think....it maybe the hula dance class performance stress reappearing again. That they are learning a new dance for the show in June and she can't remember the new steps, so the class is a stress and so she doesn't go...and so....and so...she'll savage the Oyomesan's ankles very soon.
That's what I fear!


Coincidentally I was looking back thru this blog to last June and July trying to see when my roses blossomed last year (planning an English Garden Tea Party for students this year) - and I noticed that Okaasan wasn't a happy camper early last summer...lots of coming home late, confusions, suspicions etc.
Could it be the hula pressure building again?


This morning Yujiro got Okaasan up and bathed and ready for the 9 am dentist trip again...it took her ages and ages...but they just about got out the door.

Yay!!!!....no.....

Butterbur! Cooked! By Okaasan!
Yay!!!!!!

Err...no......

She says it isn't done yet. Needs drowning in the soy sauce/cooking sake/sugar sauce that all Japanese food gets put in.

Disappointed. I tasted some of this nice fresh green butterbur last night secretly and it tastes ok. Kind of like celery.
I wish we could leave it like this and put soy sauce on the table so everyone could help themselves. But no....it'll all be drowned in the Japanese seasoning.

Anyway - this morning we did manage to get Okaasan up and ready and out for the 9 am dentist appointment. But she really needs constantly reminding and motivating. Yujiro got her all up and moving around choosing clothes - he came upstairs to have breakfast - and went back 15 minutes later to find her sitting back in front of the TV again with no clothes chosen.
By the time he was in his outside clothes and I was jangling car keys in the kitchen Okaasan got it together that she was going out SOON! and got dressed and ready to go.

Finally...just flower shots...my garden is coming out into spring and the tomato and cucumber seedlings are in. The green pepper plant might not be reborn into its third summer...and the cats keep trying to dig up potatoes. But hey! Spring!