Sunday, 28 June 2009

Susukino Okaasan....(J)

We've enjoyed two dinners this week as a couple because Okaasan didn't come home till 8 or 8.30 pm...she was busy walking the streets of Susukino!

Susukino is the nightlife area of Sapporo - lots of bars and clubs and sex businesses, touts on corners, lights and action...

We see on the GPS that Okaasan has been wandering THERE this week. Round and round she goes in a 4 block area - obviously enjoying the nightlife. I think maybe she used to go out late afternoon in Saitama, shop and have dinner she is repeating that habit here and often doesn't set out until 4 pm.

I refuse to wait dinner until she appears - I've been working and I'm hungry. And waiting would mean we'd have no evening ourselves of TV or anything else. And of course...I'm delighted to have a dinner without her....we can chat about stuff.

If this was England I'd be more worried about Okaasan wandering the adult entertainment area at night, but in Japan it really is pretty safe.

And Yujiro had a great comment: in Susukino the bad men are looking for YOUNG women, and the touts are looking for MEN! Nobody is interested in an old lady!

I started re-reading the book about Dementia. I bought it in England in February, but at that time we weren't living with Okaasan. Now I have more daily contact with her, I think it is time to read it again and review its ideas.
The other day I suggested to Yujiro that we buy sticky labels to put on Okaasan's chest of drawers (another great piece of trash station furniture!). Okaasan is always standing in front of it opening and closing draws because she can't find stuff. I thought labels "Socks", "Bras"..."Lilly Bulbs" might help her.

But he suggested this to HER very badly - kind of rushed into her room, threw down the labels and almost ordered her to do it. I love him lots, but sensitivity is NOT his style. Not surprisingly she was a bit surprised and countered that if she labeled drawers then the burglars would know how to find her valuables! both of them!!

But now having read the Dementia book again I think maybe trying to get her to label drawers and put things away would be a bad idea. Having clothes all over the sofa and carpet is some kind of reassurance for her maybe. Something from her past as a Super Housewife that is familiar: washing, drying and sorting through clothes.
Her rooms look a mess and she often can't find stuff - but maybe it all makes sense in her little world?

でも、彼はお義母さんにこれをまずい形で提案したわ――大急ぎって感じでお義母さんの部屋に入って、ラベルを放り投げ、お義母さんにそうするようにほとんど命令したのよ。ワタシは彼の多くを愛しているわ。でも、神経の細やかさは彼の得意とするところではないの。思った通りお義母さんはちょっと驚いて、もしタンスにラベルを貼ったりしたら泥棒がお宝を見つけてしまうって反論したのよ! あああああ・・・・二人共ったら!! 


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